August 2000,
Edinburgh

Whereas some are celebrity dubbin photographers, Rob Newman (star of The Mary Whitehouse Experience and Newman and Baddiel in Pieces) is a celebrity dubbin child molester.

Using a can of neutral dubbin sweetened with sherbet, Newman lures children into his dank stone cellar where, seeping oily sweat, he says "eeeeeeeee" through clenched teeth until they bleed.

Newman is shown here imparting his evil secrets to his celebrity friend Stewart Lee, the dead father of Richard Herring and star of This Morning with Richard not Judy and Fist of Fun.

Lee, who is twelve, likes dubbin but is scared of his older friend. "Help me," he pleads. "Help me. I want to play with my thimbles."